Astrology for Parents

Alex Trenoweth
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Astrology for Parents

Lockdown has been a difficult time for parents as they struggle to home educate their children with little to no guidelines and few resources. The Organisation for Professional Astrology (OPA) asked me to write a column on working with children’s chart ethically and effectively. This article is part 2. Astrology for Parents gives an outline on how astrologers can support parents. They not only have the toughest job in the world but have had to become teachers at a moment’s notice.

A quick commercial break

Before we go any further, please follow me on social media. I’m active on Facebook, Twitter, youtube, Linkedin and and Instagram. If you’d like to have a chart reading, please make an appointment via my products page. My book “Growing Pains” is also available for purchase here. Even though we’re locked down, there are still plenty of online astrological events happening. You can check out my schedule here. For you students, I have a FREE mini course on Midpoints and Harmonics. Subscribe to my newsletter if you would like to learn more about astrology from a fully qualified professional. And I also have a helpful mnemonic device for the Nakshatras. I update my website with new articles on Monday and Saturdays–and whenever I feel like it.

I work extensively with parents and adolescents (as well as younger children). As a professional teacher, I have full police clearance and ample experience in safeguarding and child protection training. Please note, as I point out in the article, I do not consult with unsupervised under-18s on any platform.

If you would like to know more about this topic, I recently gave a master class for the Mercury Internet School of Astrology (online CPA). I am also giving a class for Kepler College and also teaching a full course on working with the charts of adolescents starting in September. 

Keep an eye out for my astrology Adolescent Report aimed at young people taking their first steps in astrology.

Now back to the article. . .

In the previous section, I explained why I believed it was important to work with children’s charts. I was also clear that while firm boundaries need to be made, astrologers with the right training can be an enormous help in empowering parents to support their children with astrology. However, without proper training, astrologers shouldn’t attempt to interpret a child’s char

I probably don’t need to remind anyone that no one is perfect. If you’re a parent whose child is always in trouble (and everyone delights in telling you about it) or a teacher who just failed an observation then you know sometimes it all comes down to how to survive the day, the hour, the moment. And every single one of us has been there and let me openly admit that I do “stupid stuff” all the time. I try to make jokes about it to avoid admitting that I screwed up a lot as a parent and a teacher. But I’m also going to say that astrology can help us do better. 

Understanding your Saturn is your key to keeping your head above troubled waters. 

Your first step to being able to be in the position to “rescue” someone else is by understanding your limitations. Take a few minutes to remind yourself of your Saturn by sign, house and aspect. Think of the lessons you learned at the ages of 7, 14, 21. Reflect on how Saturn helped you “graduate” your Saturn return. If you’re lucky to be over the age of thirty, you have more material to work with. 

Help!

“Here!” a parent shouted at me whilst thrusting a piece of paper into my hands. “Read my kid’s chart before he gets kicked out of school!” Do something, they tell me as if making their child my responsibility.

The majority of parents that come to me for an astrology consultation are first time parents of adolescents. The average age of the children is around the age of 13-14 when things are getting difficult. It will become obvious why this is so as we go on.

If you’re going to work with children’s charts, you can’t let a parent believe you have a magic bullet. That child is not your responsibility and it is important to be very clear about what can and cannot be done. I am not a magical wand. I will not be involved in predicting professions, marriages, grandchildren, hereditary issues or anything else a parent wants to try to make me responsible for. It isn’t possible to see if a child is gay or straight, pregnant, using drugs or breaking the law. I can be a sounding board and I can offer advice on how to improve communication between parent and child. But astrology can provide a framework for child development.

I make it clear that every single child in the world will eventually find a way to become independent from their parent. Growing up can be painful for all involved.

Growing Up

No one comes to an astrologer because everything is wonderful and there is nothing to worry about. Working with parents is not an exception. However, the problem usually isn’t the child. So parents who put a child’s chart into my hands or ask me to use astrology to identify their child’s problem are surprised to be told that I start with the parent. Ideally, I’d like to see both parents if it’s possible to have them in the same room together. It is important to talk about their boundaries and attitudes towards their joint responsibility. Of course, I focus on Saturn. In fact I base my entire astrology consultation with parents solely on their Saturn.

That really is enough to handle—for me and for the parents. When we have a decent level of conversation around responsibilities, we can start to talk about the child’s difficulties. It can sometimes take a few return trips. And I can say with confidence, without exception, that the problem will be that the parents feel they have lost control of their child. Their Saturn is telling them they have not done something right. They are hurting and feeling guilty because their child is no longer that cute bundle of childhood innocence. If I told them what their child got up to when they weren’t hovering over them, I could cause some real upset.

Making mistakes by doing something we shouldn’t do is very much a process of growing up. Rather than taking offense because a child would rather be with their friends or play on their phones than talk to their parents, it is important for a parent to realise that this separation is very much a natural process.

Astrology for Parents

Adolescents are trying to work out who they are as opposed to who their parents want them to be. They struggle with this because they love their parents. Teenagers worry that they can’t manage in the ‘real world’. They are also scared to let go of that life preserver (the parents). They need their parents (and teachers) to assure them that if they stop struggling, they will find that their feet can touch the bottom of the pool.

Understanding this process of separation can be enormously helpful to both parents and child. Here’s where astrology comes into its own. Before I turn my attention to the child, I talk the adult in charge through their experiences. I can almost guarantee that the adult will have to be coaxed to talk about their own adolescence. This is because their own parents had the same problem they are currently trying to work -hrough. This gives me a wonderful way of illustrating to the parent that being a teenager isn’t easy. Once the parent understands the process, they are then empowered to help their own child.

Astrology and Child Development

In my opinion, nothing explains the cycles of development better than Jupiter and Saturn. Here is a summary which can be fine tuned for individuals with an ephemeris:

3 years old: First transiting Jupiter square to its natal position. Developmental milestones include confident walking, being able to be understood by someone other than primary caretakers and being potty trained.

6 years old: First transiting Jupiter opposition to its natal position. Developmental milestones include being able to control a pencil/crayons/paintbrush to create basic shapes.

7 years old: First transiting Saturn square to its natal position. Developmental milestones include losing the milk teeth and asking questions about mortality. I know from the data I have gathered that there is often a dip in academic performance at this age.

9 years old: Waning transiting Jupiter square to its natal position. Developmental milestones include being able to distinguish between fantasy and the real world.

Adolescence

11-12 years old: First transiting Jupiter return to its natal position. Developmental milestones include going to a bigger school and mixing with children from different backgrounds. I know from my database on pupil behaviour that children in this age group are more often in trouble for disruptive behaviour.

13 years old: First transiting Ptolemaic aspect from an outer planet (Uranus) to its natal position at the same time as transiting Jupiter is also sextile to its natal position. (Here is where things get a little wild for the parents and teachers). The developmental milestones include valuing peers more than authority figures and “gang mentality”.). I know from my database on pupil behaviour that children in this age group are more often in trouble for defiance.

14/15 years old: First transiting Saturn opposition to its natal position and another transiting Jupiter square.Developmental milestones include orthodontics—Saturn rules the teeth—and adolescent sulleness. I know from my database on pupil behaviour that children in this age group are more often in trouble for not doing enough work.

18 years old: Transiting Jupiter opposition to its natal position. And simply to add, just because a person reaches the age of 18, it doesn’t mean they instantly become an adult.

You will notice these are the hard transiting aspects. The hard aspects force us to take action, to make decisions or to cut losses. Hard aspects represent crises that have to be managed. Each crisis is like a building block, stacking one on another. And we all know how important the foundation is to the whole structure.

Jupiter and Saturn, again in my opinion, are enough to work with. And as Jupiter and Saturn are not personal planets, you as an astrologer don’t have to worry about invading anyone’s privacy. You are talking to a parent about how they perceive their own growth and through that, their child’s development so they can understand how they can support their child at the right times. If you think about it, this is exactly the benefit of using astrology: the right energy at the right time.

Next Time. . .

I’ll be writing more about Learning in the Time of Corona for the next issue of The Career Astrologer. Included will be the brain development during adolescence, the benefits and drawback of lockdown learning will be included. Join OPA to get the online magazine for free.

Take Home Points

–Astrology for Parents is designed to help astrologers work with parents who are struggling in these uncertain times.

–When working with the charts of children, Saturn is your guiding light

–Focus on the parents’ chart, particularly their Saturn and help them understand their own development

–help parents to prioritise the important stages of development, particularly the Jupiter return because it ‘coincides’ with the spectacular brain development during adolescence.

Alex Trenoweth
Alex Trenoweth
Alex Trenoweth, MA, DFAstrolS is an astrologer, teacher and author of "Growing Pains", "The Wolf You Feed" and the soon-to-be-released "Mirror Mirror" by The Wessex Astrologer. She travels across the globe lecturing on the topic of Astrology and Education. In 2015, she was voted "Best International Astrologer" for her innovative research on astrology and adolescence. Her work has been published in major astrological magazines around the world such as Dell Horoscope, the International Society of Astrological Research, the Organization for Professional Astrologers and she is co-editor of "Constellation News", one of the largest astrological magazines on the planet.

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